7/27/2007

Asking the right questions

Why do I always seem to fail at reaching my goals? Why don't I have a soul mate? Why am I so broke? We ask ourselves questions like these all the time.
Asking these types of questions may seem like the first step to having the goals that you desire, but that is not the case.

The biggest problem with asking ourselves these types of questions oocurs when minds come up with various answers to validate our perception of a situation. As you flood your mind with multiple reasons why something is terrible about your life, you begin to make those answers an even bigger focus in your mind. When you reflect on these types of loaded questions, you are entertaining extremely destructive thoughts.

If you were to change the kinds of questions you ask internally, your mind will create the habit of providing solutions for your situation(s). The rule of thumb is to use questions that begin with "how can I" or "how would I." If you use these examples to ask your self a question, your mind will work to get you answers. This may not work right away because you are shifting a long-standing mindset, but you must use it consistently and you must force yourself to answer the question. You may even want to create a minimum "three answers rule" when you ask yourself a question that begins with "how." The more answers you come up with, the better.

Another benefit to asking the right questions is that you become a solutions-oriented individual. You will see every situation as an opportunity. You will begin to take advantage of the opportunities quickly. If you hone your skills on asking the right questions you may even begin to find solutions to problems before others. If you do not ask yourself questions that lead you to finding the best answers, you remain on a treadmill of negativity. You may be using up tons of energy, but you will not get anywhere.

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